One of the most common questions I get from founders is:
“How do I find the right mentor?”
The question itself tells me something: most people know they need help but have no idea what kind.
And that’s dangerous. Because if you don’t know what you need, you’ll end up following the loudest voice in the room. And trust me, in the startup world, there are too many imposters with microphones.
Let me tell you how I see it, after a decade of working with thousands of founders, and living this journey myself.
1. Start by knowing what you actually need help with.
A mentor isn’t a genie. Or a therapist. Or a magic wand.
Too many founders come to mentors hoping they’ll solve everything for them — raise funds, fix strategy, build culture, and give them emotional therapy in one session. That’s not how this works.
Take time to sit with yourself first. Write down where you feel stuck.
Do you need help with:
- Strategy?
- Fundraising?
- Product-market fit?
- Scaling?
- Personal mindset?
Be brutally honest. Mentorship works best when you’re clear about what you need.
2. Don’t just follow someone who “looks successful.”
This is where so many founders go wrong.
You see someone with a big LinkedIn following.
Or a guy with “Investor | Entrepreneur | Mentor | 10x exits” in their bio.
Or someone who keeps posting selfies from startup events.
And you think: He must be the one to guide me.
No.
Not everyone who’s been successful can help you succeed. And not everyone who’s loud actually knows what they’re talking about.
Look deeper:
Have they walked the path you’re trying to walk?
Do they understand your stage, your market, your limitations?
Do they even care enough to listen to your story before giving advice?
If the answer is no — move on.
3. Test them before trusting them.
Mentorship is like dating — you don’t propose on the first meeting.
Start small.
Ask one specific question.
See how they respond.
A good mentor doesn’t just give you answers but they ask you better questions. They don’t dump their playbook on you, they help you create your own.
If someone seems more interested in showing off what they have done in the past rather than understanding what you need, that’s a red flag.
There have been many a times when someone came to me asking for mentorship and my first question was “Why do you think am the right person to guide you?” and believe me it always gives me the answer whether to accept the mentorship request from the founder or let it pass.
4. Look for someone who’s invested in you, not just your startup.
This is a subtle but powerful distinction.
Your startup will rise and fall many times. But you, the founder, will carry those scars forever.
The right mentor sees you as more than just your pitch deck or your current business.
They care about your growth as a person and belief in you, your clarity, your resilience, your ability to make better decisions and eventually be a winner.
This is why the best mentorship often feels less like “business coaching” and more like “life coaching”.
5. Know that it’s a two-way street.
A mentor isn’t someone you use and discard.
They’re giving you their time, wisdom, and emotional energy.
Respect them and their contribution.
If you ask me personally, the first quality I watch out for in my mentees is whether he is humble and coachable. Rest all falls in place by the time.
Show up prepared.
Act on their advice (or at least reflect on it). Don’t ever say yes to their advice and later discard it or don’t action upon. Iron it out between both of you and reach a consensus. That helps in strengthening the bond between a guru and disciple. Always keep them updated.
When you make progress, let them know. When you mess up, be honest.
The relationship will only grow stronger if you treat it as a partnership.
6. One last thing: You don’t need a celebrity
We live in a world obsessed with big names and unicorn coaches.
But honestly? The best mentor for you is probably someone you’ve never heard of.
It could be that quiet founder in your city who’s already solved the kind of problems you’re facing now.
Or that veteran who deeply understands your industry.
Or even a peer who’s a few steps ahead of you.
Don’t chase star power. Chase relevance and empathy.
In the end…
The right mentor won’t just tell you what to do but they will help you hear your own thoughts better.
They’ll hold up a mirror so you can see yourself and your business more clearly.
And they’ll remind you that you’re capable of more than you think.
If you find someone like that, hold on. And if you don’t find one, keep looking, YOU WILL EVENTUALLY.
You can always reach out to us.
happy venture building
- – Abhishek Tiwari
